Why is it so easy to sling mud and so difficult to thank?

Story: An interview: I don't believe in being idle or wasting timeTotal Replies: 21
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Jun 13, 2012
8:25 AM EDT
I wonder...

When there is a post which contradicts one's opinion, then there are usually showers of mud thrown into the author.

When there is a good content, like this interview with Dedoimedo, or my previous interviews with Artyom Zorin, Eugeni Dodonov or tuxchick, then nobody dares to say "thank you". Caitlyn, BernardSwiss, tracyanne, where are you now? Just hiding in your wholes preparing next set of rotten tomatoes?

That's discouraging...

Jun 13, 2012
8:48 AM EDT
> When there is a good content ... then nobody dares to say "thank you"

Welcome to the Internet, darkduck.

> That's discouraging...

Yes, but it's also the norm.

Jun 13, 2012
9:01 AM EDT
No, that's not norm.

At least, readers on the blog do post positive comments. Check comments for Carla's interview just to compare.

There are also many comments to initial Dedoimedo's interview. You can't see them, because there is an auto-redirection to the new address, but that post got about 20 comments in just few days (more than Carla's!), only one of them being negative.

This is something with the community on this site, I assume.

Jun 13, 2012
9:18 AM EDT
> No, that's not norm.

Not everywhere, perhaps. But it is most of the places I've been.

Jun 13, 2012
9:34 AM EDT
Quoting:When there is a good content, like this interview with Dedoimedo, or my previous interviews with Artyom Zorin, Eugeni Dodonov or tuxchick, then nobody dares to say "thank you".

OTOH, there is an idiom in English that hints at one reason for nobody daring to say "thank you". See the brief English as 2nd Language definition for 'fish for compliments' at http://esl.about.com/od/f/g/ig_f_fcomp.htm


Jun 13, 2012
9:51 AM EDT
I am not fishing for compliments. Instead, I wonder why people are so readily put their negative emotions here, while not doing the same for positive ones. It is an aura of this site? Or something else?

Jun 13, 2012
10:23 AM EDT

The fact that people aren't all the same, just like the fingers on you hands, It is simple!

Some people praise to encourage, others critic to get the best out of others, and many criticise to feel good thinking they are better.

Welcome to the real world


Jun 13, 2012
10:34 AM EDT
I've had a weblog (in various forms) for over 10 years. I can count on my two hands the number of "thank you"'s I've gotten on it.

It won't stop me. If it stops you, that's up to you.

Jun 13, 2012
11:06 AM EDT
Sorry, that's human nature and something that all companies with customer service departments know very well.

When you next buy something that you find is really great, do you remember to ring them up and tell them how great it is?

Jun 13, 2012
11:29 AM EDT
I always appreciate interviews with members of the community and would like to do more of them myself.

Jun 13, 2012
11:52 AM EDT
Quoting:When there is a good content, like this interview with Dedoimedo...

Good content? It was mostly drivel and nothing interesting except for two items, the fantasy novel and the crash book. I find your asking the people you interview for opinions on your blog rather silly.

I think most of your articles are rather juvenile, and if you want opinions from others in the field, be prepared for comments. Maybe your skin hasn't fully toughened yet. Believe me, I've had a few flames sent my way. Not all posts get comments either.

Does that mean you should stop? Of course not, continuously improve and learn what you can from comments and take your own course in developing more content. I'm sure most people here would like you to succeed and create a useful site.

Jun 13, 2012
12:04 PM EDT
If you're fishing for compliments in this game, you'll likely find an old boot on the end of your hook.

Jun 13, 2012
1:27 PM EDT
Ive been making free software available for years on my website and had 1000's of downloads and I can count the thank you's and donations literally on two hands.

Welcome to the Internet.

Jun 13, 2012
4:13 PM EDT
I didn't comment because I wasn't on the site for several days. I read the Interview and kind of shrugged my shoulders. Was there content there? Hmmm... I found it singularly uninteresting.

Jun 13, 2012
4:25 PM EDT
Also, pot calling the kettle black here. Darkduck, you went off on a personal crusade against a distro developer and I called you on it. You were the one slinging mud, not me. Sometimes the truth hurts.

Jun 13, 2012
5:04 PM EDT
@darkduck as it has been said here already, welcome to the internet, its cruel and as a whole, running with an undercurrent of negativity. Don't let it desuade you though man, just try and better yourself for yourself and dont worry about commenter too much (other than to correct the odd editorial issue of course).

Most importantly, dont take the comments here on LXer too much to heart, you are dealing with a very focused group of individuals (some of which might have social disorders, no offense intended by that, I'm just saying) most of which have a very clear and absolutist view on their area of interest e.g Linux and open source.

While i don't always agree with your point, i enjoy reading it, any point. be it well formulated or knee-jerk, any point of view has its merits and some basis in truth.

Just keep doing what you're doing.

It's a thankless job but someone has to do it.

Jun 13, 2012
5:09 PM EDT
Ubuntu and puppy dogs -- that's what heaps the praises on you.

Jun 13, 2012
7:26 PM EDT

I'm sorry you feel that way -- I thought that on the balance I might be considered more as one of your supporters on LXer.

Not that I particularly like or dislike your blog. I would agree that some of the criticism of your blog, here on LXer, has been arguably overly harsh and has even become somewhat knee-jerk in character. On the other hand you yourself have been arguably overly resistant to accepting reasoned criticisms, and lately have even (I believe) evidenced a "bunker mentality" towards criticisms, so I wouldn't say that the fault lies mostly in one particular camp or the other.

I have also mentioned (for whatever my opinion is worth) that the quality of your blog posts, in both composition and technical substance, have noticeably improved. That might not be a "thank-you", but it is a compliment.

- - - - -

Now I'm going to pontificate a little (and likely exceed my competence, but I trust you will bear with me and give me the benefit of the doubt).

I think that part of the problem here is (as others have alluded to) that the LXer readership does not really appear to be your target audience (or if it is, you're doing it wrong). I suspect that LXer readers who don't participate in the LXer forums might (possibly) be a little more appreciative of your efforts, but not a lot -- not enough to occasionally contribute a comment.

This mismatch between your intended audience, and the actual audience at LXer is likely the chief cause for most points of dispute and criticism -- on most such points there is room for legitimate disagreement, but in light of this community's standards and concerns, your positions have not measured up to the LXer community's standards -- which reflect the LXer community's experience and the LXer community's needs.

Now we get to the tricky part,

I hope you will receive this in the spirit it is given: Another part of the problem is that you seem to feel entitled to more "thank you's" or compliments than you are receiving.

Remember, that people generally say "thank-you" when they feel they have received some useful help or service: that is, when they feel that your blog article has actually helped them in some way -- answered a question or solved a problem, informed them, expressed some point of view with particular clarity, etc. People are not generally going to thank you if your post does not help them or satisfy them in some way, just because you wrote and published it -- regardless of how much effort or feeling you put into it.

If you are looking for wider approbation, you will have to improve your skills, and take into better account who your intended audience is, and what you intended audience needs and wants. If you just want to write some stuff that you like, that you find interesting or useful, that's good too, and perfectly reasonable -- but don't expect the world (or some particular segment of it) to always agree with you, and thank you, or praise you for it. That would be unreasonable.



Jun 14, 2012
4:44 AM EDT

Quoting:When there is a good content, like this interview with Dedoimedo, or my previous interviews with Artyom Zorin, Eugeni Dodonov or tuxchick, then nobody dares to say "thank you". Caitlyn, BernardSwiss, tracyanne, where are you now? Just hiding in your wholes preparing next set of rotten tomatoes?

As for myself, traveling around my wonderful country in a motor home, and for the most part completely off the grid. Now what was the question?

Jun 14, 2012
8:05 PM EDT
I'll point out that all of the people DarkDuck thinks are uniformly harsh do praise articles, just not his.

Jun 14, 2012
9:11 PM EDT
Thanks for the laugh DarkDuck. (there I thanked you see?)

The comments in this thread are hilarious.

BTW what on earth is a DarkDuck?

Sorry couldn't help myself

Jun 15, 2012
8:38 AM EDT
> BTW what on earth is a DarkDuck?

That's been discussed before. There are two likely answers:



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